What do you do when your marriage is in trouble? When your feelings have changed and you both seem to be going in opposite directions?
When words don't work and prayers arent seeming to be what you thought you'd be praying for.
Its scary. I have no one close to me to talk to since my mom passed away. Its devastating.
I feel like the more we talk the more we hurt each other. i love my husband but he is not who he used to be. I have caught him lying to me and while the things he has lied about have been petty its the point that he was dishonest.
WE find ourselves enjoying being away from each other more than when we are together.
i don't know what to do.
Voting
Oh Shay, I'm still so sorry about your mom - it makes it so much harder if you don't have your mom to talk to.
ReplyDeleteWell, I am by no means a marriage expert, but Derek and I have definitely had our ups and downs. We're just coming out of a down period now, and it takes alot of work, but it can turn around!
I would suggest reading as many marriage books or listening to marriage sermons if you can - it always helps put things backin perspecitive for me so that I can work on the things that I can improve. And I'm very pro-counseling. Derek hates counseling, but he agrees to go when we need it, because it's a good way to help us both refocus and get back on track.
When we go through a tough time in our marriage, I usually realize I have a tendency to nag or disrespect Derek when I'm angry, and that usually makes things worse. So I usually have to remind myself to work on that, and when I do, things get better for us. That's one of my main problems.
Obviously I don't know your situation, but this is stuff that I think helps us when we have a rough period. And I think it helps to remember that everyone has rough times in their marriages, and they don't last forever if you work to reverse that! Plus early pregnancy is just a rough time hoormonally anyway, which makes things harder. I'll be praying for you guys.
I am so sorry to hear about everything you have been going through. At the same time I have so much hope for you and your marriage. Please don't give up.
ReplyDeleteLast Fall when I was about 5 months pregnant my hubby and I went through a MAJOR rough patch. I too was lied to. Long story short, we went to Christian marriage counseling and we are stronger and more in love than ever. I will tell you what helped us is Forgiveness. I was shown how to truly forgive someone. Forgiveness is for yourself not for the other person. When you truly forgive you never want to hold that thing against the other person again. I chose to forgive, truly forgive. I never thought I would be able to, but God worked in mighty ways. As soon as hubby knew I had truly forgiven him we could move on. I have never held that issue against him since and now we talk openly about it, and how amazing it is that we overcame that. There is so much more to our story. If you would like to email me for support I would be happy to respond. I will be praying for you.
I totally agree with Callie's comment!